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Where do you draw the line when it comes to infidelity? Is it a purely physical act, or does it also involve emotional betrayal? According to a survey recently published by the Institute for Family Studies , the line itself wasn’t particularly blurry for the 2,000 U.S. adults that participated; what does and doesn’t count as cheating was reasonably clear.
However, what might be more fascinating are the frequency, demographics and predictors of affairs. Here’s a summary of the key findings. General Views On Emotional Infidelity There was no question as to whether affairs that are sexual in nature constituted infidelity; this is an undeniable fact.
However, the sample’s views on emotional infidelity were far more fascinating. That is, non-sexual relationships that mirror the closeness and intimacy of romantic relationships. Among the national sample, 76% believed that an emotionally intimate but non-physical relationship in real life (not online) counts as cheating.
This belief was even stronger among married individuals—80% of whom saw these relationships as unquestionably unfaithful. In addition, a slightly lower but still significant majority—72% of the total sample—felt that online emotional relationships qualified as infidelity. This percentage was higher, once again, among married participants—with 76% viewing online emotional connections outside of a relationship as betrayal.
Overall, these findings suggest that most Americans, especially married ones, expect their spouses’ emotional fidelity—regardless of whether any actual sex is involved. This finding mirrors research from Current Psychology , which notes that while emotional infidelity is somewhat difficult to define, there are nevertheless emotional behaviors that partners find inexcusable to engage in with others. These include, but are not limited to: The Most Common Types Of Affairs In Marriages Beyond views on infidelity alone, the survey additionally captured the prevalence of different kinds of affairs in relationships—namely emotional-only, sexual-only and combined sexual-emotional affairs.
Specifically, among the 1,313 participants that were married, the following results were found: Notably, there were significant gender differences found among those admitting to infidelity. Respectively, the analysis showed that men constituted a much larger percentage of purely sexual affairs (75%), as well as combined sexual-emotional affairs (56%). On the other hand, women reported engaging in far more emotional-only affairs (56%).
These gender differences in particular are another finding that mirrors existing psychological research—specifically a September 2024 study from Evolution and Human Behavior , which explored cheaters’ most commonly cited reasons for their infidelity. Overarchingly, women more commonly endorse emotional reasoning for cheating—such as feeling unfulfilled, neglected or unstimulated. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to attribute their infidelity to physical reasons —such as having unmet sexual desires, or even finding an affair partner more attractive than their primary partner.
Predictors Of Emotional Affairs In terms of the survey’s demographic findings, age was a predictor of emotional affairs—with older individuals more likely to report them. This likely reflects more time in relationships and opportunities for affairs. Education was also considered a significant predictor, as participants who did not finish high school were more likely to report emotional affairs compared to those with at least “some” college education.
Gender, race and ethnicity, however, were weak predictors of emotional affairs in this sample. In terms of attitudinal predictors, the survey highlighted that participants who strongly believed that emotional relationships outside of marriage count as infidelity were less likely to report having an emotional affair. However, other attitudes—such as views on the importance of religion and divorce—did not significantly impact the likelihood of emotional infidelity.
Unsurprisingly, relationship-related predictors were also uncovered. Specifically, those who reported high marital stability were less likely to engage in emotional affairs—which, in line with intuition, suggests that feeling secure in a marriage might reduce the desire or need for emotional connection outside it. However, marital satisfaction alone was not significantly linked to emotional affairs; this could mean that even in satisfying marriages, individuals might still pursue emotional connections outside of their marriage.
Arguably, the most interesting findings from the survey were the behavioral predictors. Namely, the study pin-pointed three specific behaviors that were correlated to higher reports of emotional infidelity: Concerned that you might fall in line with these statistics? Take this test to find out, and receive science-backed answers from a psychologist: Propensity Towards Infidelity Scale.
