2 weeks Ago
New chapters in life bring about new realities. What was important in an earlier decade may not concern us as much in a later decade of life. I can remember going out to dinner with friends and discussing professional relationships and career building, skill development and family and parenting interests.
If we talked about health issues, it was usually related to our parents or a son or daughter’s bumps and bruises, such as a sprained ankle, a cut finger and the like. However, times change and with them our dinner time topics. When out to dinner with friends recently, the conversation quickly and predictably turned to health.
I began thinking about such health and medical concerns as my eyes surveyed the food choices in front of me. I chuckled at the thought of comparing health-related topics and the menu in my hands. Could there be a way to compare time spent on health talk and the courses on a menu? For instance, conversations about our aches and pains could be compared to the appetizer.
Such a meal starter doesn’t take long to prepare, and it simply serves to get the palate ready for the main course. An appetizer is usually a small plate that can be enjoyed by all. The same can be said of sharing information about ones’ recent aches and pains.
Giving details about an achy neck, a bruised knee, a stubbed toe or a sore back is something we have all experienced, so such topics can be discussed by everyone. The “stubbed toe” appetizer simply serves as an entry way into more serious health topics. Next comes the soup and salad.
This course is more individualized than the starter. We might all reach in to share the appetizer, but each diner chooses his or her own variety of soup and salad dressing. So it is when talking about our own recent injuries.
Here it’s time to reveal those slips on the ice, trips on the stairs, falls from bikes and the misuse of a sharp mandolin. Painful to be sure, but just like eating our soup and salad course, recovery from such accidents doesn’t take long, hopefully, and we are ready to move on. Now the course we all came for, the entrée! Typically, one checks prices, gets recommendations, thinks about all the possibilities, compares preparations, and orders that main menu item.
Compare this to the health biggies ...
knee or hip replacement, shoulder or back surgery, cataract procedures, prostate issues, carpal tunnel and other arthritic-related operations. We check prices, get recommendations, think about our possible choices, compare procedures and make a well-informed decision. No one wants to participate in such events, but it is likely that many of us will.
This main course takes a long time to chew and digest, and some of our companions’ entrées are juicier to talk about than others. How our entrée was prepared by the chef, how long it took and any side dishes that come with it are topics to be discussed. Of course, when ordering an entrée from an a la carte menu, one can have a side dish.
A side of physical therapy is what comes to mind here, as the health-related discussions move from surgeries to post-surgical rules and regulations! Dessert is that sweet indulgence that will linger on our palates after our dinner with friends. This sweetest part of the meal can be compared to the sweetest part of the table conversation. On the menu here is talk about our travels, good news about family members, life accomplishments, new endeavors and bucket list disclosures.
Such a sweet spot in the meal happened to me twice recently. On one occasion, a friend came to dinner with a big question ..
. what was the most important thing we learned from our parents? It sparked a discussion for the entire meal. It was great.
Another time, seven of us dining out went straight to the topics of tariffs, purchasing new cars, the Illini’s chances in the tournament and a recent cruise. We nary spent a minute on health issues. The sweet news we share (the dessert course) is the part of our meal we relish.
It would be a shame to eat out with friends and come away with only dinner-time memories of our aches and pains, our slips and trips, and the replaced parts of fellow time passengers. We want to remember the laughter of friends as we share a good meal. Let’s be sure to order dessert and linger a while over a second cup of coffee.
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