1 week Ago By Tina Pemberton
Tina Pemberton had not been on a date since her 20s. Now, she enters the exciting (and occasionally problematic) world of meeting new men. Over the last few years, I’ve been on dating apps every day.
On my favourite, Bumble, women choose the men. I like that because you don’t get bombarded, and if you decide you don’t want to answer any more, there’s nothing they can do. But when you’re swiping as much as I do, sometimes your finger goes the wrong way – I’ll swipe right and think “oh no!” I began my dating journey during Covid.
I spent most days in the garden of the London flats where I live with my son and became friendly with a neighbour who was constantly on the apps. She encouraged me to put up a profile and I thought, “why not?” I was married for over 30 years , and at first, I had no idea what to say to these men. It was all so alien to me – the abbreviations, the lingo.
I hadn’t dated since my 20s! I tend to be quite a talkative person, so I’m not good at writing one-liners – if they asked me a question, they’d get an essay. Most of the men were quite monosyllabic online, plus the ghosting was a surprise! I could be chatting to someone for a week, then they’d disappear with no explanation. I’ve never lied about my age, but I’m a “young” 70.
It’s not that I don’t look it, more my attitude to life – open and optimistic. Whereas men my age can become so crusty and grumpy, they could be my grandfather. I’ll swipe the ones who seem interesting, then speak to them on the phone – there’s no point chatting online for weeks.
If they live close enough, they’ll often say, “why don’t we just meet?” and that’s ideal, because that’s how you really find out if there’s an attraction or a friendship that might grow..
