1 week Ago By Darwin Moises
@THE_ROCK: Maybe I’m just too passionate about the truth. I’ve always believed honesty and integrity would be enough. But I’ve noticed that people who smile in front of you and say something else behind your back — they’re the ones who get ahead.
They’re called diplomatic, while I get labeled too blunt. Once, I spoke up in a meeting about what went wrong in a project. No blame, just facts.
After that, people distanced themselves. Meanwhile, someone who stayed quiet and agreeable got praised for being a team player. Some adults I talked to said I should learn to be two-faced if I want to succeed.
Not to lie, but to pretend. Smile when needed. Hide what you really think.
And I can’t lie. It’s tempting. But if I have to pretend to get ahead, what am I really leading?DJ: Your email took me back, big time.
I remembered things I did right and areas I could’ve handled better. Back then, I was all about just being real. No matter what.
That honesty got me where I am today. It also earned me respect. So, I have zero regrets.
But if I could talk to my younger self, I’d say this: staying truthful and strategic is the real test of character.Sticking to the truth in a world that loves wearing masks? Yeah, it’s tough. But it’s possible to stay authentic without burning out or burning bridges.
Before calling someone out, ask yourself what outcome you are hoping for. Now you know your team’s vibe. Seek alignment first before a project post-mortem.
Especially when a higher-up in the room. Then if you need to speak up, you can say you think everyone did their best under pressure then jump into a solution.As for the person who stayed quiet? I can’t speak on that directly.
But over time, I’ve learned that silence, when used intentionally, is a power move too. In moments like this, it is mind over emotion. When you’re in the heat of the moment, check in with your heart.
But let your mind lead. Not the other way around. What’s the bigger goal? Will speaking up help the team grow or just satisfy your frustration? Is there a way to say it in a way that builds, not breaks?Speak the truth with intention, not impulse.
Not every battle needs to be fought. Will this matter a week from now? A year from now? Let’s say a teammate mentions a project you both worked on but leaves you out of the credit when presenting to the boss. Will it matter long-term? Yeah, if it becomes a pattern.
It could mess with your opportunities or morale. So, address it. But privately.
Calmly. When you’re ready, tell the person you don’t mind bouncing ideas off each other. But you’d appreciate it if you acknowledge each other’s contribution.
Speaking the truth doesn’t always mean speaking immediately. Sometimes holding space and picking the right moment can make your voice way stronger.Building relationships is a game-changer.
My mentors nudged me on this when I was younger. But I was stubborn! Still a work in progress. Over time, though, I realized that this is just as important as building your track record.
People are more likely to receive truth from someone they feel safe with. And this is not about being two-faced. This is about trust.
If they know you care, they’ll be more open to listen to what you say. Even when it’s hard to hear.When I first became a manager, I was lucky to have an incredible team.
Honestly, they’re among the best I’ve ever worked with. And there’s one thing we’d always remind each other — sometimes, you gotta lose a battle to win the war. Dude, heroes don’t only shine in chapter one.
You gotta stick it out, to stay in the battle all the way through. Truth isn’t just about spitting facts. It’s about knowing how and when to speak in a way that lifts people up.
Not knock them down. Your integrity is your edge. Don’t lose it.
Let it evolve into wisdom so you can stay in the game with truth and grace..
