Miss Manners: A couple we don’t like had us over for dinner. Do we have to invite them to our place now?

Miss Manners: A couple we don’t like had us over for dinner. Do we have to invite them to our place now?You can send your questions to Miss Manners through her email, [email protected].

A pair of neighbors hosted my wife and me for an impromptu dinner, to which we contributed a nice salad. The food was fine, the apartment lovely. We have sent them a thank-you note.



We’re sure to see them again. We all live in a nice retirement community, where there are restaurants and a lot of socializing. Do we have to invite them to join us at a restaurant at some point? Your confidence that you are not required to reciprocate in your apartment, though technically correct, startles Miss Manners, as she thinks of the restaurant alternative as an escape clause more than a proper equivalent.

I had been using this valet service for about four months when, as the attendant brought my car back to me, he said that gratuities are not expected, but are very much appreciated. He said this in a very calm, professional, not at all demanding voice. Some medical facilities ban tipping because they pay parking attendants a living wage, and do not want patients with medical conditions to forgo using the valet because of the cost.

Others are out to make a buck and do not much care if the staff feels the same way. Some post ambiguous signs, presumably to have it both ways. We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly.

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