‘I couldn’t unravel this country pub conundrum - and the staff were no help’

Sitting on the corner of a triangular plot, it was a good job there was a Shepherd Neame pub sign standing above the fence or I might have missed The Alma altogether. But round at the front, the neatly weather-boarded white façade looks every inch the quaint village hostelry we were seeking for a quiet Friday afternoon drink. And once inside this Painters Forstal pub it’s equally apparent this is somewhere with a long history of providing thirsty travellers with a convenient stopping off point.

But before Mrs SD and I could get through the door, a guy pulled up in a Land Rover and limped in ahead of us before going straight into the kitchen to have a chat with the staff. When a second person, this time a lady, also walked in with a pronounced limp it looked like a real coincidence, but when the very next punter came in dragging one leg I began to wonder if everyone in the village was afflicted or maybe some sort of bizarre prank was being played? Unsurprisingly for this time of day, apart from a few limpers, the pub was fairly empty and the barman seemed genuinely pleased to have something to do. His co-working barmaid kept herself busy polishing the brass pumps while he poured a Whitstable Bay Pale Ale for me and a large Malbec for her.



Facing a host so keen to chat, I asked how old the pub was and my new found friend said: “It’s been here for ages”. It’s an L-shaped building with low wood-panelled ceilings and appears as if it has been decorated throughout fairly recently and, looking at the structure, I reckon it could easily be 150-years-old. There is no pool table, no jukebox and certainly no fruit machine, although there is an interesting-looking dartboard at the far end near to the toilets, with its rope and wooden backboard, it looked like an extra decoration.

Whilst I’m on the subject, the loos are incredibly small but, as Mrs SD maintains, size is not important and the gents’ facilities, with a single urinal, are beautifully formed with everything fully stocked and excellent two-tone tiling on display. Mrs SD reported the ladies’ toilet is equally well appointed. Fresh daffodils had been carefully placed in the centre of each table and long strings of fairy lights were slung across every available free space.

The rest of the staff were hidden away in the kitchen busy prepping for the evening shift but at one point we were joined in the bar by a trio of pub bosses who proceeded to hold a business meeting and discuss everything from upcoming menus, to staffing lists and the wines to be stocked – all interesting stuff. They seemed to be covering a fair few subjects and, with my lack of qualifications, far be it from me to make comment in any of these areas they were discussing. However, if I was to pass on one small suggestion, I would recommend investing just a little time talking to staff about the rich history of The Alma.

None of the bar staff had any idea about the heritage of the pub that I’m sure has been an important part of the local community for many years. And, when I noticed a hatch at the top of the wall in the bar and questioned its purpose they again had no idea – I took a picture in case a knowledgeable reader may be able to offer a suggestion. To be fair, key tasks were being performed well – we were served in a timely fashion and the bar staff were all very friendly.

Equally, there can be no doubt there’s an effective regime of cleaning in place and the pub is in immaculate condition, but arming the staff with even a little of the background behind the place they’re working would surely be a good idea. We enjoyed our visit to this classic Kentish country pub and, given all the kitchen prep we witnessed, slightly regretted our decision to eat before we visited. Finally, it wasn’t until we left that I spotted the garden, which is separated from the pub by the car park at the front.

Like the rest of The Alma it looked extremely well kept and presented though, at the time, it wasn’t set up for use with tables and chairs still stacked up and protected from the weather. THE ALMA, PAINTERS FORSTAL, FAVERSHAM ME13 0DU Décor: Looking as if it’s been recently decorated, the whole place is beautifully presented with a number of interesting historical items dotted about – special mention for the tiling in the gents. ***** Drink: The pale ale was well kept and well served and Mrs SD said both glasses of wine were decent examples.

The choice of drinks is somewhat restricted for obvious reasons. *** Price: A pint of Whitstable Pale Ale will set you back £5.20 and a Hurlimann 30p more at £5.

50. The large glass of Malbec and Esk Valley Sauvignon Blanc clocked in at the same cost, £9.40.

A packet of crisps is £1.40. *** Staff: Obviously, the staff will be a great deal busier at other times, but while we were in, the barman and barmaid were happy to divide and rule – he pulled the pints, she concentrated her efforts on getting everything gleaming.

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