Feel Out Of Control Around Food? The Reasons Why May Surprise You

According to registered dietitians, it's more complicated than you're giving yourself credit for.

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When you’re walking around , do you stop yourself from buying cookies because you’re convinced you’ll eat them all in one sitting? Or maybe whenever the waiter or waitress brings chips and , you feel powerless and can’t stop eating them. If you feel out of control around food in these ways or others, you’re not alone. You may think it’s a problem with your willpower or that you need to avoid food more (spoiler alert: it’s neither).

We spoke with dietitians who shared several other explanations they think are at play. Yes, you read that right. Feeling out of control around food may mean you’re not eating enough rather than you’re eating “too much.



” “When we don’t give our body enough to eat throughout the day or week, the very natural assumption is for our body to assume we don’t have enough opportunities to eat and therefore encourage you to take advantage of chances to eat when they arise, which could mean eating past fullness, feeling out of control around food, eating to the point of feeling physically sick or even eating a lot of foods you don’t really enjoy,” said , a non-diet dietitian and owner of (and who also inspired this piece with her ). Eating too little isn’t always purposeful. O’Malley spoke to how our diet-obsessed culture can disconnect us from our body’s signals.

“If you’re feeling like, ‘I have no idea what my hunger or fullness cues are,’ you’re not alone,” she said. : “One of the first steps to building a healthy and trusting and your body is to give yourself enough to eat throughout the day, each day,” O’Malley said. A generally helpful structure, she continued, is eating every three to four hours, starting within an hour of waking up.

A dietitian can help you figure out the specifics, and the that can help you find the right fit. Even if you don’t think you’re currently or actively trying to restrict your intake, that mindset can still sit in your subconscious. “No shame to anyone who’s done a Whole30, been a member of Noom and spent a year trying intermittent fasting — you’re probably in the majority,” said , a dietitian and the owner of in Raleigh, North Carolina.

“The thing about these diets is that their rules don’t just fall out of your brain the second you go off of them. ..

. If you’re not intentional about challenging the you’re holding onto, it’s likely that you’ll feel confused and out of control around food.” : If you notice dieting food rules in your head — like “I shouldn’t eat X food because Y reason” — Byrne encouraged challenging the thought.

“You know that the diet didn’t work for you, so why are you still playing by its rules?” she said. She also shared some words of hope: “Over time, you’ll find that the food rule voice in your head will die down, and you’ll be able to eat with less guilt and second-guessing.” Maybe you had an growing up — one who pushed you to eat as little as possible.

Or maybe your current roommate is particular about eating “clean” or says she’s “bad” when she eats a processed snack. That might look like discussing what you two will and won’t talk about when it comes to food or how you can keep foods your roommate doesn’t want in the house, she explained. As O’Malley noted, most people need to eat every three to four hours.

If you haven’t eaten in a while, it makes sense you might feel ravenous or have an urge to eat past the point of fullness. “When we do get an opportunity to have a meal or snack, it can lead to feeling out of control around food, related to wanting to quickly manage our hunger to feel better physically,” said , a registered dietician and regional director of nutrition at . Have you ever said “no” to a food or tried to avoid it because you think eating it makes you “bad” or because you’ve already had “enough” “bad” foods that day? Read on.

“Food rules aren’t always as straightforward as ‘I’m going to eat less.’ They can also be an obsession, preoccupation or feelings of guilt or shame about eating certain foods,” O’Malley said. (We can thank diet pill ads, food marketing and other diet culture propaganda for that.

) “When we feel guilty about eating, it can influence how we allow ourselves to eat, making us eat too little, fall into the binge-restrict cycle [and] choose lower-calorie, less-satisfying foods, which leave us overly hungry later on,” O’Malley said. So when you are around those foods, you may subconsciously or consciously see that as your last or only chance to have them, which perpetuates a “last supper” mentality, O’Malley explained. As a result, you may eat past fullness and feel ashamed.

“You feel like the day is ruined,” said , a registered dietician and a member of ’s HEALers Circle. “This triggers a sense of scarcity around these ‘forbidden’ foods as individuals prepare to restrict them, so they see it as a last chance to enjoy these foods that they are convinced they should rarely have in the future.” “It might seem counterintuitive, but when we are eating enough food regularly, are working to see foods as morally equal and are allowing ourselves to enjoy foods we like without guilt, we feel less out of control around them and can enjoy them without only feeling out of control,” O’Malley said.

It’s important to know that you may still feel out of control or ashamed at times. Being kind and patient with yourself is crucial; otherwise, you may get thrown back into the cycle. Then, look at other patterns and how you may want to address them.

She suggested asking yourself, “Are you eating enough? How can you tell? Do you think it would be enough, satisfying and enjoyable for a friend or loved one? Can you start to challenge morality labels around food and remind yourself that your body needs food multiple times a day, every day, and you are never guilty or needing to compensate for eating?” Now, emotional eating isn’t inherently bad — in fact, it’s common, normal and understandable! So it’s important to be compassionate and understanding with ourselves about it, too. For example, you may want to lose weight and opt to eat less or not get as much variety in your diet. “The reality is that food and body are both far more complex,” Singh said.

“Eating to shrink your body tends to discourage individuals from listening to their hunger and fullness cues, ultimately leaving them struggling to regulate while eating and feeling more out of control during meals. This can bring up shame both around eating and also about how they feel toward their bodies.” Related.

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