4 days Ago
LOVE it or hate it, whether you celebrate it or not, the Christmas season is well and truly here. The shops are bustling, the traffic is busier than ever, people argue over car parking spaces, and things can start to become a little hectic every time we pop into town. If you’re a parent, the extra pressure of everything that comes with Christmas can really begin to take it’s toll.
Add to that the work parties and anything else that we may have to deal with and it’s easy to see why so many people find this time of the year the most stressful. With just a week to the big day, I thought I would put together a few suggestions for getting through this final week of advent. * If you’re anything like me, you may well have left your Christmas shopping to the last minute.
This final week can be one of the most stressful parts of Christmas. The trick is to make it easier on yourself and not worry too much. If you have forgotten a present for somebody or need to get one at the last minute, just give yourself some thinking time.
Don’t rush out and buy something over-priced or unsuitable. If you really are unsure, get someone a gift voucher from a shop they like, and let them bag themselves a bargain in the Boxing Day sales. * At this time of year the alcohol is freely flowing at many occasions, and you may feel pressured to overindulge.
Don’t be afraid to say no if someone is trying to get you to have that extra drink that you really don’t want. Know your limit and stick to it. No matter where you are, never leave your drink unattended.
Remember it is a long holiday season so pace yourself. * If the thought of a party or event is causing you to think about all the things which could go wrong, just take a moment to remember the fact that most of the things we worry about never actually happen, it’s something I talk about frequently in this column. Sometimes, we may have to disappoint someone else in order to look after our own mental well-being.
Remember my golden rule, self-care is not selfish! * If you’re at an event and you can feel yourself becoming stressed or anxious, take yourself out for a brisk walk to clear your head. If that’s not possible, take yourself off to the bathroom for 10 minutes if necessary, and take some slow deep breaths in and out, counting as you do it. This simple technique can work really quickly to lower your stress levels.
It can help you to quickly reassess the situation if things are becoming a little tense or overbearing. * Stop worrying about how others may appear on all the party-snapshots you see on Facebook etc. Remember if something looks too good to be true, it probably is.
As a therapist, time and again I find people comparing themselves unrealistically to others, usually as a result of social media. Go out, have fun, be kind to others, but most of all be kind to yourself. * Christmas preparations can often leave us feeling overwhelmed and stressed.
While the spirit of the season is often associated with family gatherings, gift exchanges, and copious amounts of food, these can also be triggers for anxiety, guilt, and unhealthy habits. Amidst the flurry of festivities, don’t forget the importance of setting and maintaining healthy boundaries to protect your mental well-being. Christmas is the season of goodwill, it is also a time that can hit hardest for anyone who has lost someone, especially if this is the first Christmas without them.
Many people who are alone can feel lonelier than ever at Christmas. If you know of someone on their own, why not use the coming week as a chance to check if they are OK, maybe even take them a card or a mince pie. I’ll be back again next week, writing about how to get through the big day itself, and cope with one of the biggest Christmas stressors of all - relatives and family gatherings.
If you find yourself unable to cope throughout the Christmas season, then remember the Samaritans are open 24/7, you can call them anytime on 116 123. Never underestimate the benefit of just having a friendly ear who will do their best to understand whatever it is you are going through. You can also call NHS on 111 and press option 2.
Text Shout to 85258 (open 24/7). Papyrus Hopeline for people under 35 is open 24/7 on 0800 068 4141. Campaign Against Living Miserably is on 0800 585858 until 5pm.
* Martin Furber is a therapist qualified in various modalities and an Instructor Member of Mental Health First Aid England. Email [email protected].
