Dear Abby: My daughter-in-law thinks I prefer my grandson over her kids

DEAR ABBY: My daughter-in-law is very opinionated. At times, we get along. But, in the past, she has upset me by accusing me of not doing the right thing.

She and my son have two young children together and full custody of his son from another mother. I complimented my grandson on looking after his little sister at her birthday party and was told that this wasn’t the case, as she was being bullied by the other girls while he stood by and watched. My grandson has been through a lot, and I got upset and said to my son, “Perhaps you need to consider the partners you choose!” Bear in mind, this was all done via text.



I have given help with my grandchildren whenever it was requested. My daughter in-law is now accusing me of preferring my grandson over her children, which is not the case. We now have a fractured relationship and can’t seem to resolve it.

Please, can you help? — FRACTURED IN AUSTRALIA DEAR FRACTURED: Your grandchildren all share the same father, regardless of who their mothers are. Your grandson could have handled the bullying problem better than he did, but he may not have known how to step in. (Or may not have felt he was strong enough to intervene.

) If you weren’t fully aware of what was going on, you couldn’t have known the compliment you gave the boy was unwarranted. HOWEVER, for you to have told your son what you did about his wife was insulting and unkind. Begin apologizing profusely to her AND your son for losing your temper and saying something so hurtful.

If you do, it may begin to heal the breach. ** ** ** Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.

DearAbby.com or P.O.

Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069. ** ** ** To receive a collection of Abby’s most memorable — and most frequently requested — poems and essays, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $8 (U.S.

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