2 days Ago By Tracy Briggs
FARGO — I was planning to write another Back Then column today about something that happened in the 1920s. But then I talked to Amanda Lea. Our conversation made me pivot — still back in time, not to the 1920s, but 20 years ago, to the early 2000s, the roller coaster days of early motherhood, and the beautiful, messy chaos of trying to have it all.
If you don’t know Amanda, you should. She’s that delightful voice you’ve heard on the radio in Fargo-Moorhead for the past 15 years — first at Froggy 99.9, then at 98.
7. As a morning show host, she’s woken up a groggy Red River Valley with stories, laughter, and heart. However, on April 9, a tearful Amanda announced she was stepping away from the mic.
It was a tough decision — she still loves her job — but in her heart, she knew it was the right time to spend more morning moments with her daughter, Sidney, 6, and son, Briggs, 4. Let’s not forget husband Nick Linder, who’ll likely appreciate having her around in the mornings, if only to curl Sidney’s hair. “She’s a girl who wants her hair curled in the morning,” Amanda told me.
I first met Amanda around 2013 through our mutual friend, Cris Linnares, who started a women’s networking group called Diva Connection. Right away, I was drawn to her smile, her energy — and her animal print. Anyone who rocks cheetah is cool in my book.
Not to mention, when you’re talking to her, she locks in on you and makes you feel like you’re the only one in the room. Over the years, I didn’t see Amanda often, but it was always lively and fun when I did. I watched her career soar as she and her co-hosts won “Best Local Radio Show” five times in The Forum’s "Best of the Red River Valley" contest.
Loyal friends and listeners definitely feel her departure. At The Forum, we knew her goodbye was a story that had to be written. Amanda quickly said yes to an interview, and we fell right back into the comfortable rhythm of our Diva Connection days.
But amid the laughter, we both shed a tear or two as she shared her decision to step away from the microphone to be with her kids. Ugh. I was there, girl.
As were millions of us. I left TV news in 2005, mainly for the same reason. I loved my job as a reporter and 5 p.
m. anchor, but I craved more flexibility to be with my growing girls, who were then 3 and 1. I was lucky that Forum Communications found flexibility for me, first in radio, then writing for The Forum.
But like Amanda, who’s also grateful for her supportive employer, Radio FM Media, I remember how tough it was to leave a career I’d dreamed about since I was a kid for the great unknown. I knew how to report the news on TV, but I didn’t know much about being a hands-on mom. I just knew I felt the pull — the guilt, the fear of missing out.
It showed up in the little things — coming home in the afternoon to see the aftermath of a stressful morning: Disney Princess plates still on the table, half-eaten Eggo waffles now sticky with cold syrup. I pictured my husband, Mark, and the girls watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse as they hurriedly nibbled their breakfasts, as the clock ticked closer to late. Picturing that chaotic scene made me both happy and sad.
I felt that same pang when Amanda talked about wanting to curl her daughter’s hair or just be there when the kids rolled over and said, “Good morning.” I also heard the fear in her voice — fear of leaving the known for the unknown. No job lined up.
No firm plans. Just full-time motherhood, which sounded pretty wonderful to both of us that day on the phone. I think we both realized (and online comments from listeners after Amanda’s goodbye backed it up) that time is a thief, work waits, family doesn’t, and no one ever says, "I wish I’d worked harder," on their deathbed.
Our conversation felt like a full-circle moment for me. I’m old enough to be Amanda’s mom (a young mom, thank you very much), but I wanted to hug her over the phone and tell her everything will be OK and how excited I am for the memories she's about to make. I was in her shoes 20 years ago.
We have a lot in common. Both of us married cute Iowa farm boys, had two children and worked in early-morning radio. (Total coincidence that she named her younger child Briggs.
If I’d known she would do that, I would’ve named my younger daughter Lea.) And there’s one more thing Amanda and I share — something no one wants to: we both lost our moms far too young. Hers died at 54.
Mine at 55. That kind of loss changes you. It makes you realize how short time really is.
The days fly by. Trust me — I’m finishing this column on my daughter’s 23rd birthday. Wasn’t she just 3 when I cried about leaving the job I loved? Yep.
But I don’t regret one day of the last 20 years. And I’m now in a career I love even more. To Amanda, and all you moms out there making the tough decision to stay, leave, work part-time, full-time, or not at all: just know that millions of us have been where you are.
Do what works for you, your family and your bank account. Trust that things will fall into place. Even so, we know the choices aren’t easy.
Neither is motherhood. But it’s worth every bloomin’ second — cold, sticky waffles and all..
