Bill Linnane: Like Gary Barlow, I know the trials and tribulations of having a massive son

Everyone loves a giant baby. There is nothing quite so reassuring, so amusing, as a big fat baby with a giant head, smiling at all and sundry as they stuff carrot puree and Petits Filous into their massive toothless maw. Giant babies are not only comical, they also bring the message that the species is safe – with their layers of chub, they are designed to survive not only a famine, but also small falls, as they are basically an airbag made of flesh.

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