3 days Ago
Want to in a whole new way? Behold: the lotus sex position. The lotus, aka Yab Yum, is an , and literal millennia later, itâs still the go-to position for people looking to take their . The lotus is , and you can combine those two aspects however you please.
âItâs a great option for folks looking to explore different ways of engaging in sex with less penetration and more intimacy,â says , an AASECT and ABS-Certified Sex Educator. âIf you want to be , Lotus is a good position to explore.â To start, sit facing each other with one of you sitting on the otherâs lap.
Wrap your arms and legs and around each other. âStart by as you gaze into one anotherâs eyes,â says âs resident sexologist, . If thatâs as far as you want to take it, you can just linger there in your connected state.
âItâs a wonderful position to just practice eye-gazing, syncing your breath, or ,â says sex expert and psychologist . If you prefer more physical pleasure, you can grind against each other, stroke each other with your hands, or opt for penetration. Whatever you do, the idea is to do it slowly and mindfully.
â , youâll tune into and (sound, touch, taste, sight, temperature), and this can heighten pleasure and connection,â says OâReilly. With all that eye-gazing and connection, the lotus can be intense, so go ahead and adjust as you please. âIf youâre someone who needs additional stimulation to stay focused, consider putting on instrumental music at a low volume and adjusting the lights to be lower and more comfortable so as not to distract,â says Frye-Nekrasova.
If the eye contact is too much, skip it. Feeling each otherâs heartbeats and breaths can be intimate in a differentâbut just as goodâway. âYou donât get points (or pleasure) for being a purist,â says OâReilly.
How to Incorporate Sex Toys If you like more stimulation, you can enhance the lotus with . Try vibrating toys, since thereâs not a ton of deep thrusting, says founder of Austin Concierge Therapy, , an AASECT-certified marriage and family therapist and certified Imago therapist. âThe vibration helps add to the intensity of the physical experience, which increases the mental and emotional one.
â She recommends a like a , for vulvas, and for penises. F0r added stimulation, you can try and , or opt for something that can increase comfort and support, like beneath your backside or the headboard for support. Incorporate toys or , or play with sensory options (like blindfolds, ice cubes, silk scarves, or warm water) to change things up, recommends OâReilly.
Ready to go deeper than ever? Here are some ideas to get you two headed toward that higher plane of pleasure. 1. The OG Lotus Your partner sits on a flat surface with their legs crossed.
Facing your partner, sit on their lap, get as close as you can, and wrap your legs around their torso. Then, your partner tucks their legs under you. Wrap your arms around each other and feel your chests melt together.
(Pro tip: This position works best if you put the stronger person on the bottom.) 2. Rocking Lotus Get an even more intimate vibe going by holding each other very close and adding a gentle rocking motion.
Rock together or take turns controlling the motion. Heighten the feelings of connection and passion with moans, heavy breathing, or some whispered words of love or dirty talk. If all that skin-to-skin contact gets you to a point where you really need to cum (like, ASAP), move apart a little and hook your legs over each otherâs so youâre forming sort of a W shape.
From here, you can masturbate together, masturbate each other, throw down with dueling toys, or whatever else will get you thereâitâs up to you and your now deeply-connected-souls (and groins). If youâre solo, you can still embrace sensual mindfulness via the Lotus Life Meditation, a practice developed by certified somatic sex educator , founder of . Cup your vulva with your hand and rock back and forth, immersing yourself in the sensations and noticing any feelings that come up, physically and mentally.
Cum or donât come, this is between you and your vulva and the Universe. 5. Office Chair Yab Yum If flexibility is complicated for either partner, try doing the lotus in an office chair.
One partner sits in a chair, the other sits facing them with their feet on the floor to control the grinding motion. Each person places their hand over the other personâs heart, and you can use the free hand to hold your partnerâs neck or a Wand vibrator, says Sloan. Maintain eye contact to strengthen the connection.
The lotus works as an too. Just have the person on top lean back a little to give the penetrating partner a better angle of entry and more access to stroke the top personâs penis/vulva. And donât forget the lube! 7.
The Double Yum If you want some extra clitoral stimulation, lean back onto your hands to open up your body. Encourage your partner to use their finger to or try a to make it extra spicy. This is also good if all the eye gazing is becoming a little too intense for either of you.
8. The Face Time âYou can assume this , simply for the pleasure of being close and enjoying one anotherâs bodies,â says OâReilly. In this variation, focus on caressing each otherâs faces.
âThe thin skin on your cheeks can be highly sensitive (and erogenous). If youâve ever felt an orgasm tingle through your face, you know how sensitive it can be, so take some time to touch one another gently and sensually.â If you decide you want to take it further, grind against each other and/or bust out a wand vibrator for .
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